Tag: Communication

Actions Speak Louder Than Words

Your words and body language must be in sync with your message.

 

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I AND I – NOT I

When we speak, we send two kinds of messages to our audiences. While your voice is transmitting a verbal message, a vast amount of information is visually conveyed by our appearance, manner and physical behavior  – why because our actions often speak louder than our words.

Research shows that more than half of all human communication takes place nonverbally. When we speak, listeners base their judgment of us and our message on what they saw, heard and felt. Our audiences often remember what we were doing when we said what we were saying.  In public speaking, your body can be another very effective tool for adding emphasis and clarity to your words.  It can also be your most powerful instrument for convincing an audience of your sincerity, earnestness, and enthusiasm.

Your physical actions must agree with your verbal message.  If your actions are distracting your body language can defeat your words. Whether the purpose of your presentation is to persuade, inform, entertain, motivate or inspire, your body and the personality you project must be appropriate, not only to what you say but also, to how you say what you said. Your words and body language must be in sync with your message for it to resonate with your audience.

If you want to become an effective Public Speaker, you must understand how your body speaks. While you can’t stop sending your audiences nonverbal messages, you can learn to manage and control the negative and to accentuate the positives.  With practice, you can learn how to make your body speak as eloquently as your words once you understand your body language and your actions speak louder than your words.

 “Your actions speak so loudly, I can not hear what you are saying.”                               ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

 

Your Eye Contact

Your eyes can also be your Control Device

20180621_232252When we speak, we involve our listeners with our eyes to make our presentation more direct, personal and conversational.  One sure way to break that communication bond is by failing to look at your audience.  No matter how large your audience may be, each listener wants to feel a sense of personal connection with you the speaker. With your eye contact, you can amplify your voice and the conversation exponentially.

In some cultures, the act of looking someone directly in the eyes is a symbol of sincerity. In several studies, it was noted that speakers who established eye contact were judged to be more truthful, honest and credible than those who did not.  By looking at your listeners as individuals, you can convince them that you are interested in them and that you care whether or not they accept your message. This technique of making eye contact with every audience member as you speak of your is often referred to as the art speaking one too many. With practice, it can be mastered.

Eye contact can also help overcome nervousness. When you look at your audience and realize most are interested in your message, that instant feedback can decrease nervous tension if any exist. Not only do your eyes send vital messages while you are speaking, they also receive feedback to let you know how your audience is reacting to your message. By watching your audience’s reactions, you can make immediate adjustments to your presentation.  Your eyes can also be your  “Control Device”

After your voice, your eyes are the most powerful tool when communicating. Use them to amplify your message. Engage your audience with eye contact. With time and practice, you will develop the ability to read your audience reaction as you speak and develop the ability to tailor your words accordingly. Develop your eye contact and will become a better communicator and a more effective Public Speaker.

 

 

 

 

Make a U-Turn​

Public Speaking is an Art not a Science.

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 Make a U-Turn

Public speaking is an art and not a science, however, over the years, I have heard many coaches caution – Watch your “I To You Ration” – the number of times you use I vs you, especially when telling your personal stories.

While it is OK to deliver your personal stores in the first person, there comes a time when you should make a U-Turn, simply because if you don’t, history has shown you risk losing your audience. Even a personal speech should not be all about you, it should also be about you and you, your audience.

Much of what we share in our speeches is personal. Things we did, things we saw, things we felt. As a result, we all have a tendency to overuse the pronoun I, even when a better connection can be made with your audience if you were to Make a U-Turn. Turn some of those “I” moments into “you” moments to include your audience in the picture or scene you are developing. If you do,  you will make a better connection with your audience.

An effective technique when considering a U-Turn is the use of dialogue or questions to engage your audience. Here is one example from one of my speeches:

LOST

  • “Have you ever lost your glasses, when they were right here (in your hands) or perhaps it was your wallet! And as if that was not bad enough, you lost your mind and ask one of your kids – the smart one – did you see my wallet? Only to receive the answer that would make any saint a sinner – Where was the last place you left it. Daddy!!”……

Try turning some of your scenes into a silent conversation between you the speaker and you the audience. Make a U-Turn after I moments. That too can also be very effective. Don’t focus on ratios, focus on your art in the context of your speech. Observe the difference in the connection you are making with your audience as you continue to develop your art and the art of making better U-Turns.

 

 

 

 

Your PowerPoint Presentations

Silence Sends The Message

Blue hillsThere is a revolution taking place in the world of presentations. With the growing popularity of webinars, new technologies, and Microsoft PowerPoint 3D tools, presenters are now challenged more than ever to improve their speaking skills, their PowerPoint presentations and to find new ways to engage audiences effectively, over different platforms.

Many of those challenges facing presenters, especially those delivering webinars are not new but they may be magnified when presenters don’t have the luxury of being face to face with their audience. So what it the secret to keeping your audience engaged for the entire duration of your presentation? Whether you are face to face or remote, if you make your point, the power of the presentation and not your PowerPoint, you will be successful on any given platform.

Any executive or professional will tell you, the higher up the corporate ladder you go, the more important your presentation skills will become. As a Technical Support Analysis, I saw firsthand presenters embrace new technologies, adding the latest bells and whistles available, while their presentation seemed to scream silently, what is the point? Conversely, the presentations that were not too fancy not too plain, always seem to work best with audiences. The point of those presentations quickly became a conversation with those audiences.

There are many tips and tricks posted on the internet on how to modernize your presentations. Whatever you choose, remember it is not all about you; the messenger, it is all about the point and not the PowerPoint. So here are a few strategies that can help you with your next presentation.

  • Know your main point – the key message you want your audience to receive and retain long after the presentation.
  • Get to the point early and stay on point – Be the messenger – not the message.
  • Be classy not too fancy. Us the 10-second slide rule. Slides should not take more than 10 seconds to read and understand.
  • When presenting webinars, personalize your presentation. Use the list of attendees to engage your audience by name.
  • Close with a powerful statement that includes your main point – Do not end with the question – Any Questions? – Any Questions?  – Then Your closing!

Finally, to add power to your point, you must add energy to your words. Keep in mind “Silence Sends The Message” – A little silence adds power to your point and your PowerPoint!

 

 

 

Nervousness & Public Speaking

If you are not afraid of the outcome, you will not be nervous.

 

IMG_1215A little nervous energy can show that you are passionate and even care about what you are presenting. Too much nervousness will detract from your performance, however, I do believe that if you are not afraid of the outcome, even when competing, you will enjoy the experience and nervousness will not be a factor.

Here are 10 tips we all can use to control nervousness:

  1. Know The Room: Become familiar with the speaking are before you are called to speak. The view from the speaking area is quite different from the audience view or the view from the back of the room.
  2. Know You Audience: Meet and if possible greet some of your audience as they arrive. This can help you connect with them as you look out into the audience.
  3. Know Your Material: In the words of Dr. Ralph C Smedley “A prepared speaker should not be nervous”. Nervousness will increase if you don’t know your material.
  4. Relax: Get on your feet, stretch a bit before taking to the stage.
  5. Visualize yourself giving your speech: Harbor positive thoughts. Visualize yourself being successful and you will be successful.
  6. Think Positive: Audiences don’t want you to fail. Smile and they will smile back at you.
  7. Don’t apologize: Don’t call attention to any of your slipups. Those slipups may very well have gone unnoticed.
  8. Focus on the message: When you focus on the message, your attention moves from your anxieties outwardly towards your message and your audience.
  9. Turn nervousness into positive energy: Add vitality and enthusiasm to harness your nervous energy.
  10. Gain Experience. Experience Builds confidence: Grasp every opportunity you get to SPEAK. Grasp every opportunity you get to EVALUATE others.  That is the key to becoming a better speaker. 

Your Quotable Quotes

We should speak to be repeated

20180617_171815One of the many statements I heard early in my speaking career that inspired me even to this day is, we should speak to be heard, we should speak to be understood, we should speak to be repeated, not only by ourselves but also by others.

Since the beginning of time, words of wisdom have been said by famous speakers and even mere mortals like yourself.  Many timeless words of wisdom can also be found in the Bible, and also in the wisdom of our parent’s frustrations in their moments of tireless parenting. While it OK to borrow from their wisdom and Quotes which encouraged, inspired and entertained us all, we should also create and constantly update a file of our own with your own words of wisdom. Who knows, one day they too may become as famous as those we all know and love.

When delivering quotes, it is a good idea to refer to Martin Joo’s 5 styles of communicating: Frozen, Formal, Consultative, Casual, & Intimate which were covered in my previous postings. Many quotes are best delivered and received by audiences in the Frozen and Formal registers:

  1. Frozen:     Formal and elegant style of speaking. Ask not what your country etc.
  2. Formal:     Used to address audiences…  I have a dream etc….

Your delivery will determine your degree of success, however, your quotes must be strategically placed in your speech. How and when your Quote is delivered, is very important. Keep your Quotes short. The shorter the better. Here are a few I love.

Don’t find fault. Find a remedy!  Henry Ford. (You too have said that many times.)

Anger is just one letter short of danger.   Proverbs 14:29

The Lord protects the innocent and the foolish and those of us who are twice blessed, (Big George – My Dad – RIP).

 

     

Your Foundational Statements

Great speeches are not written – they are Rewritten!

3866033Your Foundational Statement will often determine success or failure when writing your speech. That statement can be a short sentence or catchy phrase.  It can be a humorous or provocative statement, shocking facts or rhetorical questions. Whatever you choose, it should make your audience think, “Wow! – That’s interesting, tell me more.

Most speeches generally have an introduction, a salutation, discussion, and conclusion.  Your introduction should grab your audience’s immediate attention. It should clearly identify where you are taking your audience. You should also try to make your opening relevant to your audience. Audiences are always more willing to pay attention if they can relate to your subject matter. While a salutation is always optional, if done well with sincerity, it can help you make a better connection with your audience.  

Next, you should go into what I call the Discussion phase of your speech. Here is where you give your audience reasons to buy into your point of view with facts and figures. Be the expert by presenting your material with natural excitement, and strategically placed humor. Establish your Foundational Statement. Tell a story to make your point or make your point by telling your story. Personalize your speech. Use vivid language and remember the rule of threes when qualifying your references. Once you are sure that you have made your point, don’t repeat yourself, move forward. Get to the Conclusion, keep moving forward,  You can recall later.

Telegraph your conclusion to let your audience know you are closing. This can be done with a simple phrase – “My fellow Toastmasters” – “Ladies and Gentlemen”. Summarize the main points. Repeat your Foundational Statement.  Recall what you told your audience in your introduction and discussion phases.  Finally, you should leave your audience with a call to action. If you are sure that your closing will leave your audience with a burning desire to take some action in the minute of silence after you have concluded, STOP! you are done, however, remember great speeches are not written – they are rewritten. Now you must edit your speech until you have a tight final copy that is ready for delivery.

The Power of Tongue Twisters

Tongue twisters can be fun!

HipstamaticPhoto-481376334.599027 (1)A tongue twister is a sequence of words, sounds, phrases or sentences that can be difficult to articulate clearly, especially when repeated quickly and often. One example of the power of tongue twisters and how they can be used to correct speech impediments was featured in the movie – The King’s Speech.

In that movie, tongue twisters played an import role in helping Prince Albert who became King George VI in real life overcome, his stammering. One of the tongue twisters used in his therapy sessions was the following, “She sifted seven thick-stalked thistles through a strong thick sieve.

” The original King’s tongue twister:  “I have a sieve full of sifted thistles and a sieve full of unsifted thistles because I am a thistle sifter.”  Tongue twisters can be fun. Some focus on the letters A-Z, sounds or alphabet. The following are a few of my favorites.

Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.

A peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked.

    If Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers,

            Where’s the peck of pickled peppers Peter Piper picked?

************

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck

If a woodchuck could chuck wood?

       He would chuck, he would, as much as he could,

        and chuck as much wood, as a woodchuck would

if a woodchuck could chuck wood

************

There was a fisherman named Fisher

who fished for some fish in a fissure.

        Till a fish with a grin, pulled the fisherman in.

Now they’re fishing the fissure for Fisher.

***********

How much ground would a groundhog hog,

if a groundhog could hog ground?

              A groundhog would hog all the ground he could hog,

if a groundhog could hog ground.

                                                                           ************

If you are having problems with articulation, or stammering, try tongue twisters.  Make them a part of your warm up exercises even when you are preparing to speak.

How to Develop Vocal Strength

Proper Breathing is the Foundation of a Healthy Voice

Cork2In speaking, breath control is of supreme importance. Therefore, all speakers should give some time and thought to the development of their natural speaking voice. In order to find your natural voice, you will first have to correct your breathing. To secure control of your breath, the following physical conditions must be maintained.

  1. Correct Posture
  2. Free (loose) neck, throat and shoulder muscles
  3. Correct inhalation of breath
  4. Controlled emission of breath

Begin by taking deep breaths – In through the nostrils, out through the mouth. Proper breathing is the foundation for a healthy voice and control over nervous energy that can make your voice quiver.

One of the best exercises to strengthen your voice is the cork exercise. All you need is the cork from a bottle of wine. Start by placing the cork lengthways in your mouth. Read a passage from a book. Read a  poem or try speaking with the cork in your mouth. The idea is to get the speaker to begin strengthening the muscles we all use daily when speaking. Breathe naturally as you speak. 

To take this exercise to the next level, cut a groove into the side of the cork as shown above. Bite into the cork, to let the groove fit into your upper front teeth. Repeat the same readings you did earlier, however, this time you are opening up even more. The objective is to achieve as much clarity as possible as you speak with the cork lodged in your teeth. I would highly recommend you do these exercises in private.

Do these exercises for two to three minutes per day. After a month for sure you are going to see a marked improvement in your diction, enunciation, and resonance. Your voice is your instrument.  To keep it turned, every now and again, put a cork in it.

Breaking the Ice

Icebreakers are not one and done

IMG_1980 (1)The first speech a new member of Toastmasters or any organization delivers is called the Ice Breaker. Ice Breakers give speakers the opportunity to begin speaking with confidence on familiar topics. It also provides them the chance to start developing their model for the preparation and delivery of future speeches.

Icebreakers provide a variety of choices. You may introduce yourself to your fellow club members. You may wish to speak about what brought you to the realization that you needed to improve your public speaking skills. You may choose a topic or cause you are passionate about.  However, the allotted time for an icebreaker is four to six minutes. A time limit that should be respected.

That set time limit has a specific purpose. It is designed to condition speakers to focus on a structure, economy of words as well as getting a feel for working with timers without having to concentrate on their devices. With time, you will begin to feel your green, yellow and red lights when you are on the platform. Therefore, discovering your speaking rate is very important. Calculate the number of words you speak by merely reading a passage is one standard method. For more information on that subject go to the resources page of  http://www.davidbrookstexas.com

For my icebreaker word count, I use the following manner:  (4 to 6 -1 =5)  5 times my wpm (words per minute) giving time for pauses and laughter.  My word count should be between 600 and 650 words. For speeches that are 5 – 7 minutes I use. (5 to 7 -1=6) 6 times my wpm which gives me a word count of about 750 to 780 words.

While there is no single recipe or formula for preparing a great speech, there are a few fundamental ingredients that can make your presentation memorable. Focus on your format. As you continue to become more comfortable with your structure for icebreakers, in particular, you will notice a natural tendency to approach your future speeches in the same manner as you do icebreakers. Icebreakers are not a one and done.  In time, they will be your default model for preparation and delivery of your speeches. The more you practice them, the better you will become as a speaker.

The following are a few additional tips for preparing icebreakers.

Where I was, where I am and where I’m going is one of those “hip pocket” icebreakers you can give at any time with very little preparation. If your scheduled speaker is absent, take the opportunity to practice. Keep an Icebreaker evaluation form handy at all times.

Make your opening remark a Foundational Statement. It is the foundation on which you will build the rest of your presentation.

Your greeting to the audience should follow the make a point, tell a story or tell a story to make a point format. For your Vignettes V1, V2, and V3. Remember, less is more. Use no more than three Vignettes. V1 -Transition -> V2 -> V3 -Time permitting.

Establish a phrase in V2 that will be the memorable phrase or statement of your speech. That statement is called your Magic Moment. Every speech must have one.

Signal to your audience you are closing on your V2 if you have only two Vignettes, If you have a V3 do it on the V3 – i.e., My Fellow Toastmasters.

Restate your foundational statement at the beginning of your closing and summarize your main point as you proceed with a call to action if appropriate.  Don’t thank your audience, your audience thank you for your presentation. Mr. or Madam TM is fine.

Stand and deliver is an excellent delivery approach for beginners. Move the material you prepared from your head to your heart and the hearts of your audience. Let your words dictate your body language. Build on the speaking skills you already have to establish your formula or receipt that you will use as you prepare and deliver your future speeches.

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